I was basically told that "I was over-reacting to the loss of my computer engineering career" a year after I had a breakdown & couldnt get another position because aerospace had crashed in Calif & no one wanted to hire a high salary computer person in the business end of computers even though I had my degree in Accounting also.

BUT what they failed to help me dig into was the fact that ALL my suicide attempts & depression had a mych deeper reason that no one helped me understand UNTIL I finally left my bad marriage of 33 years that I was then financially trapped in. Wow was that an eyeopener for me to finally realize that. It became obvious when I left & moved 2100 miles away & my depression didnt follow me & I started feeling better than I ever had in my whole life.

That opened my eyes to my chikdhood & the similarities my marriage had to my parents. Bith my parents had died & the ONLY close family I have is my daughter who lives 1000 miles away. I was finally free to figure out myself, something I had never really done because I was ALWAYS reacting to dysfunction & focused on my degree or my career.

I now have a wonderful psychologist who has helped me get through a bad trauma & helped me learn skills & finally helped me integrate my present with my past to understand what I had in reality experienced.

Its awesome to have a new book of life & close the old one.

Do I hold it against those past MH care givers? NO. they had no idea what I was going through because it was subtle & it took me a lit of research & understanding my reactions. I could have never expected them to get it while I was living in the middle of it. I am just thankful I left & was able to observe the difference & figure it out then get the validation that showed me I was now correct.