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Originally Posted by StuffandThat
I've made an account here to share my, what was coherent thoughts on my experiences and hoping others here would have similar thoughts and experiences.
Im thinking it maybe I have DID or NOSDD, But worried that I'm biased, but worried about sharing with my therapist. She nice enough, she's never said anything I really didn't like personally. But I'm not comfortable with her, I'm not comfortable with anyone, not comfortable with myself.. And I'm not comfortable with the idea that she might understand me more than me.
Soon enough I know I'll be convincing myself that I'm fine and I don't need to she her anymore... Which is bull, I'm defiantly messed up.
Today I tried my best to keep my floaty distracted head in the room. my therapist asked what helps to ground me and I couldn't think or speak... I was freaking the hell out on the inside but on the out I just looked stupid.
My thoughts get high jacked. Like in session I'll have a train of thought and I'll be present in the room.. Then all my thoughts will go like a thread being pulled out my brain or sometimes all at once.. and dissociated.. but inside I'm freaking out...
In sessions I have foggy voices in my head that reply to my therapist, but not out loud. But I'm not really aware of them until I leave.
The things I thought id write are not the things I have written, I can't remember what they were. Although im sure they were more precise...
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not sure what NOSDD is because the USA (where I am located) no longer have NOS disorders. do you by any chance mean OSDD? sometimes my cell phone and computer auto correct the wrong way for me. I tried googling NOSDD and could not find anything named NOSDD
anyway what you posted I go through and its called many different things in me, some dissociation and others part of my many other health issues and sometimes completely normal.
my opinion is it would be helpful for you to talk with your therapist, that way you wont have to worry anymore about which this is in you, sometimes just getting a therapist to say hey thats such and such can calm things down a bit.
I did notice in your post your therapist does talk with you about grounding. that right there says your therapist already knows you have this problem and they are helping you with it even though you have not actually told them. Maybe they are just waiting for you to say something before they actually discuss what dissociative disorders you have. please consider telling your therapist about this, maybe even print off your post and let them read it.