I am sorry you are hurting and think you should talk to your therapist about how dejected you are feeling. You have already gotten some good feedback and advice to think about before you make your decision.

What if your therapist had said no to the friendship right when you hinted or outright asked to be friends, would you have stayed in therapy? I know I would not have.

When I spoke to my therapist about being friends, her response was, "Right now you are in need of me as a therapist, not as a friend." Another time when I asked she said that is not a decision that could be made then. It would have to be made upon termination of our work together. Many time throughout my 18 months of therapy the possibility of friendship felt real. When I terminated therapy I did not have an answer from her, but I knew that I would be okay if the answer was no to a friendship.

I am sorry that you feel rejected regarding touch. Your therapist does allow touch (hugs), but he may have changed his mind about other forms of touch and if he did he needs/needed to have a discussion with you. It’s unfortunate he did not bring up the discussion again before you brought it up. It could just be timing. I also struggled with touch issues. Could he have possibly have meant to put your arms around him when you hug each other?

I needed to be at least 3-4 feet away from the person I was speaking with and obsessed with smelling bad. I had no idea that any therapist touched their clients in any way, shape or form. She touched me (my knee and then my arm), and I was able to ask in an email for her to do it again. I was ecstatic when she said yes. Then I started reading PC and found out touch was a thing, yet very controversial. At the time, many posts seemed to poo-poo touch. Good-bye hugs came after touch. Your therapist does need to clarify his rules about touch. Btw, my therapist forgot to get my permission before she first touched me. She does a whole consent form thingy.

Often in my therapy, I felt like we were friends, especially because we attended some of the same events in the community, the way we were raising our children, and I believed we both did not suffer fools on bended knee. The reality was, we were not friends - I was her client and she was my therapist. There was emotional work for us to do and put to the test. Meaning I needed to get off the couch and start taking part in my life; being with old friends, meeting new ones, and to work outside the house. Most online friendships can be nice to have, but in reality, we are faceless people that one cannot really connect with.

Are you the person that meets your therapist outside the office to walk at times? I may have you confused with someone else, but walk and talk therapy is a legitimate mode of doing therapy. Sometimes, when we get all this extra undivided attention our fantasies have a way of seeming as if they are real possibilities.

I know my friendship with my ex therapist would not have worked if I had terminated therapy prematurely and feeling I just can’t do therapy because it’s too much of a rollercoaster. If therapy has a premature ending and a friendship is pursued I know that is grounds to bring them before a professional board. Just my two cents.