Yes, I’ve felt similar. I can’t say what these things are and what they mean for you because I don’t want to be wrong. For me though, I can guess that they are my deepest emotions coming out when part of me can’t hold them back any longer. My defenses collapsed, because my defenses had become dysfunctional. I labeled it my metamorphosis, because I’m evolving into an integrated being. Each “attack” showed me one new thing until I could see my many wounds, so that I could tend to them. I accepted my painful experiences. I felt care and love for my little self...to be so scared. I’ve also had these flashback experiences, yet without fear; instead I felt crushing loneliness or sorrow, with an image.

I had one episode where I was not afraid, although my mind was in that scary place of the past (basement). There was a golden light, and warmth; I was able to observe the space and I could control the pace and events. It was an absolutely bizarre experience, but I stayed open minded that my brain needed it to happen for healing purposes. My whole body was numb and tingly but warm and comfortable. I narrated the experience to my husband as it unfolded, and my words came out with no thought or effort. I cried deeply during this episode too, but it was cleansing. Again, I don’t know what these things are, but clearly other people experience them, too.

I was very open with my therapist about all these episodes. I’m sorry you are experiencing fear like that, and I hope it gets easier for you.