I feel like my mood swings are getting worse. I woke up with heavy anxiety yesterday and it changed to this crazy happy phase for no real particular reason. I sent R an embarrassing email telling him that I loved him and some other ramblings about flowers. Everything was just better and it was intense but within an hour I came crashing back down again. By 4pm I was wiped out emotionally I couldn't do anything so just stayed in bed and cried.

My exam is on Friday and I'm so overwhelmed right now.

I want to wreck my relationship with R and I'm tempted to email someone else today asking if they could see me because I feel like such a mess and don't want to wait until tuesday. I don't know how to sit with these feelings over the weekend whilst I just waste time in bed because my brain can't handle anymore.