I'm sorry, I know you won't see it, but acting unethically is not being a good guy. He's not only flawed he is knowingly unethical. He is disregarding your mental health and acting in his own interests. These are not the actions of a good person. I am only saying this to you because I have been where you are and said what you have said. I now see my ex Ts manipulation and grooming for what it was.