It makes complete sense. I'm also trying to hook the head and the heart together.

I have similar issues to you regarding my parents. They're good and kind people, who provided for me materially, but I'm now realising they didn't really support me emotionally. If I told my mom I was feeling something that would require her to be emotionally supportive, she would tell me I wasn't feeling that or that I was being ridiculous or send me to my room. My dad had an affair, I was still upset after two months, so she sent ME to therapy. If I had a feeling, she would call my therapist and tell her to tell me to behave. My mom didn't want a child -- she wanted a child who was a successful adult.

Funny thing is I'm moderately successful now, but that's because I did things that gave me a sense of purpose which she completely saw as wasteful (theatre gave me confidence, teaching in Asia fed my sense of adventure, insisting I go out with friends instead of sit contentedly like a doll on the sofa means I didn't end up socially inept, like her). It annoys me that she thinks she can step in now to be the supportive, proud mom, after I did everything without her help.

Thank you so much, cinnamon. I'm going to interview a few therapists, and see if I feel any better. I don't really know what I'm looking for, but something doesn't feel right with this guy any longer. At the very least, it will make me feel like I'm back in the driver's seat.

Thanks again.