I've tried a bunch of guided meditations online but they all seem to make me feel a lot worse..

It occurred to me though that meditation and dissociation are very similar. So I did some googling and found out its known that M&M can be harmful to people who dissociate.

When mindfulness goes wrong

http://www.new-synapse.com/aps/wordpress/?p=350

What is your experience with Meditation/mindfulness?