I am feeling very depressed. If I had a couch to lay on that is what I would do, but I do not right now. My couch has been placed in a room with everything else. I have to wait until this room I am in is finished being tiled and painted. I took out a huge line of credit to pay for this. The room has a very bad smell to it since my mother had no control over her bodily functions before she passed on. I feel so unhappy right now.

I have never had everything go bad for me like it has been now. I cannot afford another car, I may lose my license, lose my insurance, and be sued. I appear to be going blind in my left eye. Soon glasses will not be able to compensate for my worsening sight. I just found out that I have a damaged disc in my lower neck that will get worse. All of this on top of my DUI which has not found anything in my blood to have caused this. The doctor told me to get back with him if it happens again. What??? I or someone else may be dead the next time it happens. The job search firm cannot help me right now due to me having no car. I really need that extra money.

I thought I may not be handle all the terrible things that went wrong a few months ago, but all of this bad stuff continues to happen with me. When will it all end? If I did not have the adopted family that I now have, it somehow would be worse. What is wrong with me? How is it that I go from one mess into another? I am pretty incompetent in my life right now. I know there are others that have it worse, but I am just overwhelmed now.

Still, I am fortunate enough to be able to post here where there are understanding people here to help support me. Thank all of you very much! Eventually my problems will get better. This has to happen. I am very sorry I posted this long post here. I just do not know what else to do.