PS... I think the majority of clinicians (when surveyed) said that it could be appropriate under some circumstances.

The circumstances under which it was okay varied considerably.

From the 'if we really love each other'
To the 'if we wait out the two years of non-contact'
To the 'if someone is having sex therapy'
To the 'it can be healing for some people'

The point here, however, is that due to your past issue with this you want someone who is UNIVOCAL (which is to say unwavering) on the inappropriateness of it.

Someone who is univocal about this is more likely to be able to teach you that it IS possible to have a good non-sexual relationship with a guy. And that not all guys think with their dicks. And that even when there is desire it doesn't have to be acted upon. And that... What happened was univocally harmful to you and inappropriate. Ideally... You want a sense of safety, and that will only come from someone who is safe.