Quote:
Originally Posted by Wonderfalls
When my therapist, who had children older than mine, retired I purposely chose another therapist who had children .Her children, though, are younger. She doesn't act smug about it but she's sure she will have more control when they're older than I think one does.
I know this isn't a major thing but I can see it remaining an irritation. It's not a subject I can really avoid. Do other people find there are lots of things like this with younger (and less life-experienced) therapists? That they give you advice about things you don't think they can really know about? Is it me? Am I going to be too rigid?
This is only our second visit but I've been looking for a compatible therapist and I don't know how picky I'm allowed to be. Do people find it's hard to have a younger therapist who may discount your own experience? How much difference should there be between you and your therapist for things to work out? Or is this one of those beginning humps you get over? Can you expect them to learn from you? Am I being discounted or just conceited?
|
I think you’re onto something. There are a couple of things that I’ve learned about Ts in the past few years. I’ve spoken to my kids Ts briefly and I’ve heard they’ve commented on habits during sessions as well.
I also have experience with my T as well who is about 8 years younger than I am. I don’t expect Ts to be perfect but I think that when too young there is a lack of work experience. It’s not that Ts should go through our experience to understand but there has to be some experience to experience the “adult” life and being in tune and aware of possibilities and circumstances that can happen in ones life.
One of my kids had a very young T that graduated recently as a substitute and she’s was great for them because they could relate. She would’ve never been able to handle my case.
If I were you see where you are comfortable and if it doesn’t feel right then move on to the next. You’re not stuck to any therapist. Some people have had great experiences in this forum. So there is hope.
I’m picky now. If I were to have a T she would have to be down to earth and about my age with no Little children at home. She would have to be focused with a non perfect life. I need someone who could understand my case and be focused on our work. I would think someone well established that has not much drama in their life or is able to work well as a therapist with their drama in the background is a good fit. Sometimes that’s like finding a needle in a haystack.