I would not appreciate being lectured by a T.

As for your other questions, it really depends on how long you have been seeing her and how the both of you usually operate. It sounds like you raised an issue and then didn't like her response. I think many Ts would want the client to finish a topic and might push some for that.

But I would not like being told that I was throwing a tantrum-unless that was what was going on and the T and I had a longstanding relationship.

How long have you been seeing this T?