Seriously I thought I was doing a good job forgetting him, I went out with a guy, I tried to keep myself busy. Now I've been thinking about him these past days and I have fantasies where I text him or I send him a text saying that I want to kill myself. He's the therapist that hurted me, I had a strong obsession towards him and the last session he told me I'll call the police if you don't leave. But then when I was in the hospital I texted him and he said that I need to think about my well being and that we could talk after my dismission from that hospital. I want to text him so I can hear from him and it's not the best thing to do but I want to do it. Why do I keep going after people that hurted me? It's like I'm feeling abandoned by him, I felt abandoned. I keep thinking that I made mistakes, I was a bit shy with him during sessions and wasnt really that open. Maybe if I were more open, maybe if I talked more..maybe he got tired of me. But he's the therapist, he's the one that has to put the client at ease or to be patient with the client!
I just cant forget him, when I listen to a certain song I remember him, when I see something connected to him I remember him, I keep replaying scenes in my mind and I wish I could go back in time to that last session and maybe acting differently. I want to know why he did the things he did.