Hi Matthew!

Welcome to PC!
I hope you find the information and the support you may be seeking.
Please do make yourself at home here.

I am sorry you are experiencing such difficulties. A depressed perception would cause anyone to likely feel very down on him/herself. You seem to be suffering from very low self-esteem, for which you are paying far too high of a price.

What medication did your doctor prescribe?
May I ask your age range?

I think you'd do very well with a therapist and I hope you can resolve your transportation issues?

I also think you'd do very well in an "intensive outpatient program" (IOP).

The planning of taking your life is a very serious matter. You have specified your plans for taking your life. I am very concerned about you. Please call your pdoc and tell her of your desperation so she can help you.

Is there anyone living with you? If so, please share your suicidality with him/her/them, so they can help to keep you safe. Honestly, a gun should not be within your reach at this time.

Staying safe is vitally important and is your very first step in resolving these issues. I assure you, your perceptions are off, you can be helped and you can have a very rewarding life!

Please call your doctor, as you are treading on very dangerous ground.

You may also go to the ER.

Please stay in touch here. We will do our best to support you.


WC