i think about my T 24/7 and it can't be healthy. I think about her before bed, first thing in the morning, when i'm driving, when i'm working. all the time. i have her voicemails saved and i listen to them when i want to hear her voice. which is all the time. I imagine myself in her office and try to recall little comments she made to me. I try to feel her comfort. I miss her all the time. I count down the days until i see her on my computer. I cry out her name when i'm upset. Therapy is not just a part of my life, it IS my life, and my life consists of living between sessions. I know it can't be healthy. T and i have talked before about my "need" for her and how she can't be there the way i want her to be. I'm afraid to tell her these feelings because i don't want to be rejected again. I don't know why i'm posting this because you all probably already know or feel the same thing. I guess i'm just looking for reassurance that its normal, even though its not healthy?
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"...and everything is going to be okay." Poem from T.
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