I called him this morning like 1 hour ago. It didn't go well. I was expecting something else maybe? Anyway, I took a drink to gain some courage I called him, he didn't reply at first. He then called me back (he doesn't have my new number so he didn't know it was me). I said do you have time, I need to talk to you. He said "last time you didnt pay me what are your intentions?". Last time he grabbed me by the wrists. I said that I had problems with transference and part of me wants to continue therapy. He discarded what I said and told me "No, what about the money". I told him "I dont want to pay you, you need to apologize". He then said "ok, we are finished here" and ended the call abruptly! I then sent him a few texts, I told him "if I pay you, will you say sorry". He sent me a text saying "you can come here but only with your parents and only with your psychiatrist's consent". He basically treated me like i was the crazy one. At that point i texted him this: "I don't want to go to your study at this point. At this point it seems like you don't intend to apologize to me. You can't treat a patient like this tho. I won't give you the money. I'm sorry for what happened. Have a good life".

That's it. He discarded me and ended the call like that. His tone of voice was paternal, like he was talking to a crazy person (me). At this point he doesnt deserve my money. Even if I go to him with my parents...for what? He'll humiliate me and treat me like I'm crazy.

I feel guilty about not paying him tho. But I think a good therapist won't handle things like this. I imagine a good therapist, if a client doesn't pay them, he'll find a way to talk to them in a calm way, maybe they'll ask "why you don't want to pay me?". But ending a call so abruplty? He didnt give me time to explain things. At this point it's better to lose him. What do you think about me not paying him? Is this the right thing to do? He abused me basically. So I think he doesn't deserve my money.