Perna ~ i agree that dissociation in therapy maybe what is happening .. it happens all the time .. and yes i have gotten lost before going to T's office and then once coming home.. left in so much confusion i did not know where the hell i was going. . maybe i am not a canidate for therapy .. what is left? i know at times i cannot keep it together long enough to hear what she is saying because i drift away in my mind ..she sees that part and then stops and asks me where i am. i dont know most the time .. i just go off somewhere i guess. What she sees is the blank stares.
but i want to know what is happening to me in those times and why .. what causes that? Maybe she is a trigger for me?
Maybe i should stop therapy and stay away from ppl .. cuz everytime i am with someone - even alone - i dissociate..
for example - i was doing a cornice board this weekend .. had most the material on and measured etc .. went outside for a break - came back in and was totally lost on how i did that .. stayed confounded for over an hour before it came back to me. was frustrating..and is frustrating when that happens - i forget how to do simple things too.. i hate this about me and cant seem to do anything about it.