I knew I had nightmares, panic attacks, trouble sleeping, flashbacks, intrusive thoughts...

examples...
I knew when I was having a good dream vs a bad dream that was casing me to cry, feel scared, need to sleep with the light on,...

I knew when I was hearing my abusers voice in my head or feeling like my abuser was hurting me just like it was happening now...

I knew when my heart was thumping so hard and having trouble breathing

I knew when I saw someone that looked like my abusers it would cause me to feel scared and wanting to get away....

what I didnt know was that all these problems had a name... PTSD. but I knew I had those problems. in me these problems hurt me mentally and physically so bad that I would dissociate (go numb, spaced out, not feel) to get away from them.

as an adult when I went through huricane sandy and when I witnessed a crime as part of my job I recognized the problems as being PTSD.

my point for me getting the diagnosis didnt change what was, it just put a name on what was happening (nightmares, flashbacks, panic attacks, intrusive thoughts...) I knew I had those things happening to me.