I can definitely relate. I have a 6-year-old daughter, who is on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum. I pushed hard when she was younger to get a diagnosis. I knew something wasn't quite right in her development. H said things like "You want something to be wrong with her." Which was incredibly hurtful. Because, no, of course that wasn't the case. But when I was a little kid? I had OCD. I had rituals I had to do. I worried about food safety and germs. My parents didn't understand, and in one case punished me for that (questioning whether orange juice was OK because it tasted funny--they took away a toy). And then when I developed anxiety in adolescence, it upset them, to the point that .

And then in high school, when I struggled with depression, I asked my mom to see a therapist, and she said, "What do you have to be depressed about?"

So...yeah, I wanted to make sure my daughter didn't have to go through what I did. I want to make sure she gets whatever supports and understanding she needs. And I'm trying to find any ways to help her that I can (seeing different doctors, including an integrative psychiatrist).

Marriage counselor has said I'm overcompensating with D, as he did with his kids, because he had an emotionally absent father. But I'm just trying to be there for her as much as I can. I feel guilty for the times I yell at her (like when she hit me out of frustration the other day)--MC will say that's OK and normal, but I still beat myself up over it.

I think of how stuff my parents said/did when I was a little kid affected me...and I don't want to do the same to my daughter. I try to validate her and be there for her emotionally...but I fail sometimes...And I feel bad for her if H yells at her, too. Which sets up an awkward dynamic between me and H...