Well....

I cancelled.

WHAT A RELIEF.

And I feel like a sh-it for cancelling on her. I told the sweet receptionist that I am just not ready to do therapy right now. Maybe in the spring I'll feel more into it. All I know is that I feel enormously relieved that I don't have to sit in that office thinking, What time is it and WHEN can I get out of here? It definitely isn't that I don't want to face issues, I face my issues all the time; it's that I just don't believe therapy is something that will truly help me at this point in my life. I facilitate a peer support group with other mentally ill people; that group does help me...I feel like I belong in that group, with those people. It's comforting.

I cannot thank you all enough for your prompt, honest replies. Each one of you have helped me a lot today