I am so angry at myself. I can't do anything right. I throw money around and make decisions without thinking everything through. I backed myself into a hole, and I don't know how to get out of this. Regret just hit me like a ton of bricks. I had a few days where I was kind of manicky. Not even euphoric, but almost this pressure to do everything all at once, my mind being super active, only for it to all crash. I just feel so dumb at life and don't know how to clean up all the messes that I make financially and otherwise.

I just feel incapable of making the right decisions then hate myself for doing things so quickly that are hard to un-do. I feel like jumping out of my skin, like I can run a marathon right now, because I have this excessive horrible energy that I don't know what to do with it. I'm tempted to call out work tomorrow, but since my boss is on leave, the "big boss" who barely knows me is in charge of my timesheet, so I don't want to make a bad impression. I can't turn my mind off and feel so horrible. My anxiety is through the roof. Please help me. I've been shaking and crying my eyes out. This is horrible.