This is part of BPD. Or us swings in emotion in part of our disorder.
I totally do this. I try and release these intense feelings of rage and remind myself of times when I didn't feel this way about them. Ex. That day when I called my therapist as an emergency and she was compassionate and helped me.
Then, I turn down the volume. Don't contact them to fight or rant or try to fix anything. I Focus attention on other things or people. Work on a craft project, go swimming. Distract myself from the intense hate. Eventually I will try and approach feelings in a more reasonable state of mind.

DW