The upside is things are a blank slate now and you can redefine yourself. But you *have to* take the initiative to redefine. Since my diagnosis about three years ago, I cast away all my dingus friends, I picked up mountain climbing, I cook much more, I fish more, and my hair is almost below my ears. Compare this to the "pre BP" me - charismatic but often fueled by drugs or booze, nothing interesting, pinned down by all sorts of excuses, and assimilated into society like so many other zombie-lemmings. Now I'm different and I just do whatever the hell I want. A nice element of being a "me first" person is that I'm always trying to get better. Before, I'd sacrifice myself for other worthless pursuits.