There is another thread that I replied to a couple of days ago, asking the question of needing to know everything.

It's been on my mind since I replied to it. I didn't want to throw it off track, so I wanted to share some thoughts about it and see if anyone can relate.

*** Could be TRIGGERING ****

From where I am now, looking at a fragment that I don't have an ending to.....

It's not that I have to know what happened.

I just don't know how to get out of this place.

How do I let go of it with no answer?

What happened, happened.

It is what it is.

I feel guilt.

I feel like I'm wrong and making this up. I'm looking at it though.

I can't be so screwed up that I made it all up.

It's always been there - it just wasn't so ?. (loud??)

It was more distant and gray. It was numb.

The implications of not walking away from this and just letting it be what it is are staggering.

Do I stand here and acknowledge it for what my gut tells me it is with no "proof"?

or

Do I stand here and let it go telling myself that it's just images that I am piecing together, with no knowledge of the truth?

That is denying what I feel in my core.

Something very wrong.

This place wants to be known and there is a part of me standing in between it and me.

I'm not trying to push it, but I'm tired of being stuck here.

How do you "let it go" and trust it will come in it's time?

It's like I can't let it go.