A real family that is one that you can count on. One that you can know that no matter will not turn against you. One that is someone who you can look towards for support and not just a group of people who you fear the actions of if you happen to not fit with their agenda. A real family is something that I have never known. I grew up in a home of narcissistic abuse. My "family" often acted as though they loved me, but at the end of the day, all that they cared about was seeing that I fit their image. If I didn't (and I did not), I have been nothing other than a worthless person that they feel they are "stuck" with. In short, they have been nothing but abusive, judgmental, and condescending towards me recently. In the end, when it comes down to it, I am at the very bottom of their list of priorities. However, sometimes they fool me by pretending to be "nice" to me, which seems real. But to be loved in this "family" is like a forbidden fruit that you cannot touch. Because in the end, these people do not care about me. They only care about themselves. However, I have known people who had what truly was a family. And I will always wonder what that is like, but I suppose it wasn't meant to be for me to know what that is like. As to my family, I'm just someone they're "stuck with" in their words. And they choose to use me as a verbal punching bag whenever they feel like and it and see nothing wrong with this at all. In fact, I'm the "bad guy" for even daring to call them on this.