I feel so suffocatingly lonely!

I'm a 32 year old woman, who never had a relationship with a man, except once; a man who abused me for a few months.

I tried to bear loneliness all these years, but I cannot bear it anymore. I don't even have friends to support me.

Where & how can I find a soulmate? Even more so, it's impossible for me to find one here in my society. People where I am are very traditional in their culture & religion, no man would ever accept to be with a woman who had a relationship before! And more, I'm a spiritual person who loves the world-view of cosmic evolution, & it's impossible for me to find a similar man in a traditional society.

I know this seems like a stupid post here, but I just can't take it anymore, it's hurting so much, & I'm not finding anyone to talk to about this... this is suffocating me...