Growlycat's excellent list of questions for your T has made me think of another list of questions -- the ones it sounds like your T didn't ask. Isn't non-judgmental curiosity supposed to be a T thing? This was the opposite -- it was telling you things instead of asking you, and in a judgmental way.

She could have asked-- What do you worry it indicates about someone, if they violate social norms when they contact you like this? What do you think might be different about meeting someone in person, rather than online? What kind of interaction would make you feel more comfortable about possibly going on a date? And so on-- a simple exploration of how you're going about this dating scene in hopes of happening upon some possible ideas or insights. It's going to be different for everyone, so how does she know how it will work for you?

Where was her curiosity? I agree with SalingerEsme's phrase "crashed and burned." I think your T got hijacked by her own stuff and really lost sight of her role as a T. I hope she has a bit of recognition of this and that things can be patched up!