I forgot to mention. That doctor from a year ago...she kept on asking me what if I DID decide I wanted to do it? What if you feel differently then? It's like she was trying to force me to say. Yes, I would commit suicide then. The more I think about it..what a horrible woman. I feel sorry for whoever else tries to ask for help from her. Makes me wonder if she did just recommend a therapist then when I had the courage to ask for help. Would my mental state have approved and my fiance still be with me?