I had a terrible nightmare last night and couldn’t fall back to sleep for two hours.

The dream had some vivid moments but I forgot some of it. My abuser was there. He was holding me hostage. He found out about my husband and wanted to rape me so I felt his pain. He raped me hard to the point where I was in serious physical pain.

I remember telling him I was trying to call the police so every time he found a way to make me in pain and miserable. He sent people after me to make sure i was miserable if he couldn’t be in the room. One time he left, I was able to get ahold of the police but he came back. I told him just rape me and get it over with. He said no I’m not in the mood for sex. So I had to sit there waiting for him to be in the mood which made me feel more powerless. I just remember feeling like I kept needing to run but couldn’t get away from him no matter how hard I tried.

I finally woke up in real life feeling so powerless, trapped, and empty. My dog was in my bed and I think he knew I had a nightmare. My dog hugged me for the rest of the night. I still sort of have that lingering scared feeling today.


I think I had the dream because my mom told me she saw him and he was angry at her. What does this mean? Could this actually happen? Hugs please?