Quote:
Originally Posted by growlycat
Before you decide to leave therapy (or not?) it might serve you well to let him have it verbally. That you feel Like his friendliness might have been fake all along. That you can’t trust what he says. He needs to know this is a serious rupture and he needs to hop to it on the “repair” part before he loses you. Maybe he will step up to the plate and come through. Are you able to contact him between sessions? If so you could even tell him you are thinking about quitting and you are holding on by a thread. I’m all for blasting these guys when they screw up. The good ones will make it right and not ignore your pain.
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I agree with this, too. And it could possibly take more than one e-mail or one session, too. At this point at least (we'll see after Monday's session), I'm glad I stuck through it with MC after the awful, painful phone call, a rough session, a better one, then another painful session, then a long phone call where he really seemed to listen. We don't plan on continuing long-term with him (working on termination), but at least I feel better about the ending now. Before, I was afraid it would taint the entire relationship, like I'd see him as someone who hurt me and forget any of the good stuff that went in there. But talking about it with him until he really seemed to get what was bothering me and take some responsibility for it--that helped. And really, just standing up for myself against him instead of slinking away and blaming myself helped, too.
So if nothing else, it could help if you tell him how upset this has all made you and how it's made you question your whole relationship.