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Originally Posted by maybeblue
I like empathy...or reflective listening or whatever you call it. "Wow it seems like you are feeling sad today." Somehow even though I know that is a technique, if it is said with appropriate affect, it makes me feel understood. I don't like it when they try to "normalize" my feelings. "I have three thousand clients with that exact same problem," or "I think everyone feels like that sometimes." That feels like minimizing. Even if it is completely true, I don't want to feel like one of the multitude of suffering. I want the therapist to pay attention to *my* suffering.
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You hit the nail on the head! My therapist doesn’t usually try to reassure me, In fact sometimes I wish she would a bit more! The one thing she has done though from time to time is attempt to normalize my experiences. I’ve heard “ that’s perfectly normal to have those feelings” or “ everybody” this or everybody that “... it takes away from MY experience which is quite invalidating.