Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
I am not criticizing RS or that particular therapist.
I am saying that is an example of what I find to be extremely frustrating when dealing with them and when they are allowed to speak- obfuscating gobbly gook is what it is to me. I would not be rejecting of it because I find it open honest and vulnerable- I would not understand it as being that so I could not reject it for that reason - I would be frustrated because I would not understand the point of it at all.
The reason I commented in the first place was because I was struck at how many people seemed to understand it in the same way as you do. And how I think that may be where I have a big disconnect with both therapists and with people here who seem to understand these things intuitively when for me - it is not.
The woman I hired told me she cared about me - I have no idea why she brought it up at all and no - I did not experience it as evidence she was showing openness or honesty - that is simply not my response to such a statement.
This observation is completely separate from what I might want or not want from one of those people.
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I can see why most people see it as honest, understanding and all that.
But like you, it’s not something I want or need. My psychiatrist (he was my t) never mixed feelings or relationship into our sessions. One handshake during those years, and he always kept his distance. Without me needing to tell him I needed that. Still, I did feel he was honest and had integrity- so I did trust him.
For me feelings makes me wonder if it is fake or not. I was not there to make friends, but to have someone professional help me sort out my chaos inside my mind. Every now and then I asked if my lack of emotions was something we should talk about. I said no. Don’t lack emotions alltogether, I just don’t always see the use in them. There is a time for everything.
(I did have sessions where I got emotional, but he kept his profesional face on, I might never have been that again if not)
So, yeah- we are all different, and have different needs.
I like that, it makes human beings more interesting