Quote:
Originally Posted by BudFox
I've talked to two dozen of 'em, and read/listened to many more. The profession clearly attracts a good number of narcs and insecure types, and i think it's helpful to acknowledge patterns and tendencies in the biz, rather than see each therapist as a special little snowflake.
Therapists should be held to a higher standard than other people when it comes to admitting mistakes, etc. They are paid to be exemplars of healthy relating, so they should not be given a gold star when they fess up to doing something stupid. It's their job. And when they fail at this, leaving some vulnerable person in distress, they should be crucified.
I was heavily manipulated by one, and then others that followed telegraphed similar tendencies. But who cares? I now find it futile and pointless, all my prior fretting about therapists acknowledging responsibility or not. They're just paid actors. Even if one confesses the most heinous transgression, sobs at your feet, who the hell cares. Many of them would just as quickly bounce you to the next therapist, if they thought it appropriate. They probably have little emotional stake in the relationship, because the client is not real to them, and is only one of many widgets that files through the machinery of therapy. That's my take.
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I just don't think this is true. I'm sorry you felt manipulated by a therapist and that colored your opinion of them. But do you think that all truck drivers are the same? Or all teachers? Why would all therapists have the same personalities?
I've had several acquaintances and friends who are therapists. These aren't therapists that I have seen for therapy and then became friends. I met them through other community activities and they became friends, which means I would never see them for therapy. Some of them are perfectly nice people and some of them are kind of jerks.
I truly believe that some therapists care very much about their clients. They likely don't think about the clients as often as the clients think about them, but they still care. I think that there has to be a bit of a distance in that caring, particularly when they are dealing with a lot of trauma. The therapist has to be the strong one in that dynamic. They can't get overwhelmed with the trauma too, or they won't do anyone any good.
They are also human and sometimes they screw up. The good ones will acknowledge this to themselves and to the client. The bad ones won't. It's a good way to screen out the good and the bad, honestly.