Wow just wow ....

Your plate is overflowing with discussions that seem to go in circles. Leaning towards his favor, even tho you have said “ no I do not want to move. “

From your thread it does seem very one sided. Can he not look in your area for a new job? Testing for the black belt ? I would proceed with it regardless of him wanting to do it with you, you obviously have worked long and hard to get to where you are mentally and physically.

Do you have a Therapist ? to help you sort through your feelings ? Would he consider couples counseling? I think that might be helpful to your situation.

I hope you can find a solution or at least a starting point.