Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
Yeah sounds weird. I have two people at work who are my friends outside of work so they know my hobbies. I don’t like to share my hobbies with others because I’ve been asked (many times) to make stuff for free or low pay or sell it to them-no way, not making or selling stuff for colleagues. My hobbies involve making something quite tangible. I prefer to keep it private. Wonder what they were laughing at you about. Like what hobbies could be possibly funny? Playing clown at children’s parties? Gee.
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I'll be quite frank, I don't like a lot of people that I've worked with. I've respected that they're good at their jobs, and they have the right personality for their job, but I don't particularly develop personal relationships with co-workers because I simply do not enjoy spending time with that type of person. There's nothing wrong with them, I just wouldn't be friends with them. Acquaintances, sure. But that's it.
And, I don't have time for small talk, and when I'm at work, I want to work. I have no desire to be sociable or chit chat. I've learned to make some adjustments by making some small talk to make people comfortable, but I don't need it myself.
My clients really appreciate that I'm all about work and getting stuff done. I have found so much time is wasted in the workplace with people socializing instead of actually working. I do agree that some socializing and conversing can help the flow of the office, but some employers seem to think that everyone has to be friends outside of work to work there. And I just don't agree with that.
Why? Because I have PTSD and my personal life is difficult. Because I don't have family to chit chat with and because if I were to share my personal struggles with coworkers, I'd get fired (which I was) or ostracized...that too.
I put my foot down when employers get too invasive and I express that I think certain exercises were inappropriate. I don't think there's a problem with personality tests and the like, I have done quite a few of these exercises in the workplace that helped identify different communication styles and how to bridge those gaps...and they were super helpful.
But the one described by Emily sounds way out of line. Like, try to identify someone by their childhood memory? Like, my childhood memories are none of your business. I also think that, you can outsmart these things by picking information that is innocuous and you're willing to share. Like if someone had asked about hobbies, I could have just said, I enjoy reading. And that's all. And for memories, maybe pick something where I had won an award or something so it makes me look good but doesn't reveal anything too personal.
All these workplace assessments are games.