Well, it all escalated into a full-on email meltdown, but he was there, responding, and I think I'm ok(ish) for now.

He clarified a lot... I don't think he actually remembers saying "you annoy me all the time!" But I swear that he did... and I asked him "what do I do that annoys you all the time?" and he said that compiling a list would not be helpful because then I would try to avoid the things, and he wants me to "keep annoying him."

It ends with him saying there's nothing wrong with me and he promises to tell me if he finds something wrong with me. No..to give it some tone:

"I understand you hurt and are overwhelmed. But TMC, sweetie, there is nothing wrong with you. I promise to tell you if I find something wrong with you. "

I've no idea how to take that.
Especially because I definitely feel like something is wrong with me.
Also, he's never called me sweetie before, and it terrifies me that I liked that. It feels bad of me.

It feels a bit like being told I'm exaggerating - nothing is wrong, and I'm making it up (core fear of mine). Have to let that sit til next session though. I can tell I've lost touch w/ reality.