20 years ago i worked with someone who was married but i fancied. She fancied me too and made it known she was available for an affair. I didn't because i figured she would eventually go back to her husband. i do not do hurt well and not want distraction from work because i was suffering illness and wanted to make some money as i knew i would have to stop work.

I had to and now cannot work only rarely but have a nice house home.I have had relationships since then.

Recently I was surfing a dating site out of curiosity and boredom once when i could not sleep and saw she is divorced now. But her last log in was three years ago. so she met someone or got fed up. I know where she works now about 30 miles away . i could meet her 'accidently'

I want to ask her out.The main question is should i say i saw her online and what to say if she says no that will give me a chance again and not make me look needy which i am. What is the best way to take 'no'.? To ask why or to persist or be casual and say OK.

If she says yes should i tell her about being ill. I want a rekationship not friends or just a date