I noticed that in general I hate attention from people, I don't know why I just dont like when others ask me how are you, or are concerned for me. I hate it to the point I feel bad. But I noticed recently that I always like when male authority figures (like teachers, therapists...) ask me how I am or show concern for me. I like to talk about my problems with them. When I was in high school I fantasized to show my self harm scars to one of my favorite male teachers. While for example with others I hated the idea of showing scars. It's like with those male figures, I want to concern them and I like their attention. It seems a bit weird for me.

why does this happen?
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At every moment of our lives, we all have one foot in a fairy tale and the other in the abyss.