One thing I've learned is to sit with the physical feeling. I forget precisely where I learned that, maybe a CBT workbook, but certain physical pangs relate to an emotion. For instance a sinking feeling in my gut is dread. I haven't felt dread in years but it's been rearing itself again. I'm dreading a place. Then I ask what is it about the place. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. Have I felt this before, I need to ask. And the internal questioning continues on until I make a step by step gameplan. Baby steps of course. It's like that for me.
Intensity can come from a root place from childhood. Learning what that is helps.
It takes time. Be gentle with yourself.