Hello bride: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know as I'm the right person to be making suggestions here with regard to your situation. I'm an old man & my wife & I have been married for 38 years! What I can tell you, what I always tell young people when I reply to a post such as yours, is that it takes an ocean liner's worth of compassion & forgiveness... plus perhaps a certain amount of just plain old stubbornness to keep a romantic relationship going over the long haul!

From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though there's plenty of blame to go around here. You handled some aspects of the situation poorly, as you clearly realize. But your fiancé is not helping by continually making the remarks he's making. He appears to have some serious insecurity issues.

I think the obvious answer here is some couples counseling to help the two of you work through this before you actually tie the knot, as they say. I do think, personally, that it's going to be important for the two of you to work through this before you marry. Otherwise I fear this situation will likely continue to plague you. Saying "I do" won't make any of it magically disappear. It may just turn into a sort-of chronic "rash", so to speak, that won't go away & that becomes increasingly irritating as time goes by.

You asked if you should pack your bags & go home or if you should stay & make things work with the love of your life. Well... if this man truly is the love of your life, then clearly you need to do whatever you can to make your relationship work. But it's not just you! Your fiancé has equal responsibility. And so, to some extent, the question becomes... is he willing to hold up his end of the bargain?

There is one thing you mentioned that would be of concern to me. You mentioned you've tried to leave a few times & your fiancé begged you to stay, promising to stop. I take it, however, that he has not. This begging for forgiveness & promising to stop is, to my mind, pretty-much a classic abuse tact. The abuser promises it will never happen again & begs their partner not to leave. But, of course, once the abused partner has been appeased, & the incident has passed, the scenario occurs all over again. And it keeps happening until either the abused partner leaves or the abuser finally gets the help he or she needs. I don't want to be suggesting here that what you are experiencing with your fiancé is a sign he will become abusive once you're married. I certainly don't know that. But the dynamic you're experiencing here is the same.

Here are links to some articles from PsychCentral's archives that may be of some interest. They're not specific to your situation. But perhaps some of the ideas in them can be of some help:

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/infid...en-from-venus/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/dealing-with-betrayal/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relat...-broken-trust/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/questio...tting-engaged/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-smal...appy-marriage/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/5-secre...arriage/?all=1

I don't know, of course, if you're here simply seeking advice with regard to this particular concern or if you plan to hang in here with us. However, should you be planning to continue on (we hope you do)... may I suggest you introduce yourself over on PC's New Member Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

There's a lot of support that can be available here on PC. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are the chat rooms where you'll be able to interact with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting! I wish you well...