Just a thought ...

My daughter says she didn't know how to tell me either. Even though we'd built a good relationship over the year, she still thought if she told me, I'd run away like other people did. She came to visit me and was here on the forums, on my computer, quite a bit. I'd come in the room and she'd tell me a little about what she was reading here. Then she showed me the SI forum.

Maybe because I'd heard of SI before, maybe because she really trusted me more than she thought she did, maybe because she wanted to tell me the last of her deep dark secrets ... I don't know. Whatever lent her the courage (I personally believe God had a hand in it) to tell me, I am grateful.

I think I know how hard it is for you to tell your best friend, Mandazzle. You probably worry that she will run away screaming and that will be the end of the friendship? I wish I could guarantee that wouldn't happen ... but I don't think it will. Try putting yourself in HER shoes for a minute. Would YOU run? Of course not!

I came to these forums to learn all I could about SI so I could help my daughter, not so I could run away feeling superior to her because I can handle my depression in another way! You SI because YOU HURT, <u>not</u> because you want to hurt other people. You come to these forums because there are people here who understand how much YOU HURT to SI. Try trusting your friend, Honey. I hope, if you do, it will begin to uncover some of the reasons you started to SI in the first place ... and by doing that, you will help yourself heal. It's working with my daughter. I'll pray it works for you!

Remember, too, that you always have friends here! People who understand, people who are trying to understand, people who will never desert you. Surround yourself with the love and comfort they offer and take a chance.

I'm sending you lots of warm, gentle hugs!

Good Mama