1. I would stay with what you love.

In 1967 I decided I wanted to be a research historian. I started Uni in September of 1968 but had similar doubts you seem to and in 1971, just before my senior year, I changed majors from history to sociolgy because I was expected to write a paper and present it to a group of my peers. Too shy :-) so I changed majors. I graduated with a BA in sociology into the 1972 U.S. recession.

In 2001 I started wondering, with the millenium and all and having been born in 1950 so being the big 5-0, "When I'm 85 and looking back on my life, is there anything I'll regret?" Unbidden, the question rose, "Whatever happened to history? You loved it so!" I explored my old Uni and they had an online course exactly like the one I'd skipped out of, I took it and loved it. I decided to get a second BA in history and did in May 2007, a mere 40 years after my decision to be a historian.

So, moral of the story :-) why not continue with what you love, try for it and if you don't get it and have to work the horrible job, that won't be any more horrible than not working toward it and having to work the horrible jobs anyway. And you will have been true to yourself which will help you grow. If I had faced my fears when they rose in 1971 and worked my way through the thesis writing and discussing then, maybe I wouldn't have needed the 30+ years therapy

2. I'm so sorry your friend is going with another friend. I had that happen to me; one of my best friends from high school (still is a good friend) got a flat at Uni and didn't ask me. I don't know that it is your fault for not asking her to share with you. Yes, it might have been helpful to you to face your fear of rejection and/or deal with that but, unfortunately, there will be a whole lot more opportunities for you to do that further on in life, LOL.

3. Hope orchestra isn't more stressful than pleasurable for you and you can fit in all the rehearsals you need.