Thank you for your suggestions....

and I guess... what some have missed... with this posts.. and others have not...

is that with you wear your body physically down to absoultely nothing.... you need help... physically to do the practical things... that you cannot do...

when you get to be 52.. and you have all of these things wrong with you... even the fibrom... that is constant pain..

the practical things... like getting groceries... like cooking... like... standing long enough to cook...are issues... just like if you were recovering from a surgical procedure.. and physically weak..

walking into the grocery store... takes the strength for that day... let alone.. doing the shopping on top of it...

buying micro wave food... doesn't do any good... because you eat it... and ten minutes later you "lose" it thru IBS...

you cannot eat milk products.. at least I cannot because it makes my asthma... 100 times worse..

protein bars.. drinks... make me deathly ill...

I cannot eat anything with sugar... because it triggers chemicals in my body that cause a binge... that is not mind over matter... it is a practical fact...

I cannot eat tomatoes.. or citrus... because I have GERD.. and acid reflux...

so... you see "relying on yourself"... well is a poor plan... and

yes.. I have asked for help from loved ones.... but loved ones are in more denial... than I ever was...

and.. no grocery services...

Eating disorders are very very complex.... and not "cut and dried"... especially when you reach 50's 60's....

Damage gets done to your body from the eating disorder... and it is not a matter of "making myself eat"....

I will check on a college student.. or home aide.. that might help...

I provided this for help... and also... so that maybe it would help others... I don't know anymore..

I would even accept a feeding tube but was told.. that would cause more problems... and only as a last resort...

Eating disorders are serious... life threatening illnesses... that few understand....