I don't think you sound crazy but there are times when I think that understanding the possible benign interpretation of someone's behavior causes one less pain. I would add that in my experience I am rarely correct about why someone else behaves in a particular way, and lots of the time, it's actually not about me.

My T's office smelled like cigs once. Turns out the person before me was a heavy smoker. He took out a can of that natural orange spray and let me spray the room as I liked. Then he rescheduled that person for a slot on a day other than mine. Never smelled it again.

I'm really sensitive to cigarette smoke. I told my H I would not marry him unless he quit smoking (he did) and while we lived together before we were married (shock of shocks), he always smoked on the covered porch off his office. And he was a pretty light smoker, less than a pack per day. He kept his clothes in his office closet but there were times when I thought the entire house smelled like cigs. After he quit, he would occasionally smoke. I could always smell it and said so. One day, I made a comment and he said that he hadn't smoked that day, but hung out with a colleague who smoked. I could still smell it.