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Originally Posted by justbreathe1994
Hi Snowflake, I am sorry this attachment stuff has been so painful for you. I’m sure it must have taken tremendous strength and courage for you to let go and leave your last T relationship. I just wanted to say that I can relate to what you’re going through... I’m in my early 20s as well and have struggled with growing attached to older women (teacher, mentors, and especially T’s) since I was a little girl. I’m here if you want someone to talk to, or if you wanna shoot me a PM.
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Originally Posted by annielovesbacon
I relate a whole lot to your post. Our precise family dynamics are different, obviously, but I also have looked up to teachers (and other mentor type relationships) as mother figures from a very young age. I would get very attached to the point of getting hurt. Now I have the same problem with therapists.
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Thank you both very much
it was very validating to read your responses and it helps to know that I’m not alone.
I’m still not sure why, but I’ve felt ashamed to talk about this topic for the most of my life. Now that I have a better understanding and I know where it comes from, I feel more able to comfront it and work on it... And of course hearing about other people’s experiences and opinions is always helpful.
Quote:
Originally Posted by annielovesbacon
I don't feel safe seeing a male therapist, so I see a female therapist. Something that has helped is seeing a young therapist. My therapist is only 30 (I'm 20), so it's more difficult to see her as a mother figure since she is only 10 years older. I still have some transference, but it is not as bad.
Sending hugs to you, friend. Feel free to PM me if you ever need anything or want to talk.  |
Personally I’m not sure I’d feel that comfrotable seeing a younger therapist. The fact that I didn’t have a good experience with my previous and T and some other health professionals makes me feel quite doubtful about anyone I see, and it takes me longer than before to trust them. I think that I’d feel more secure knowing that they have more experience.
Also,this my sound kind of stupid but I feel frustrated with the fact that I had to quit studying due to my mental health and didn’t have the chance to go to uni like all my friends. So I tend to feel inferior to people sometimes. I feel like seeing a younger therapist could trigger these feelings and that I would constanlty be comparing myself to her.
though I'm glad you found an alternative that works for you