Yeah, I know I sound like a sociopath....

I've just never had a real friend I guess. They all liked me for a weird racial fetish. You can say they used me. I have never felt connected to anyone in my real life. If I can't make connections, why not just try to see how people can help me?

I didn't always think like this. I would dearly love to love someone and vice versa. Hold hands, all the gooey stuff, completely and forever.

I didn't really get anything from her, either, so tossing her aside isn't really the right phrase. I'm just frustrated.

I just don't know if she has any depths. Haven't been able to mine them, anyway.