I hadn't thought of this but it IS strange that he said he went through all that horrific stuff, and is still on the dating site that brought it about.

EclairParty, you seem torn, but I'm with you on asking the people here *why* they are saying no. I hope some of them answer for you.

Thanks for clearing up your thought process. It sounds like you deal with a lot of anxiety about stuff like this regardless of whether or not its true, which makes you wonder if it's your intuition or just anxiety. I'm not sure either.

I do think it is strange what he said though, now, after reading the response I quoted here. And yeah, shoulda been in the news. Perhaps he is just a liar. You don't know. None of us know his motives. All we know is this: you two like each other, he's moving faster than you are comfortable with, you have anxiety about a man pretending to be gay in order to hurt, kidnap, or kill you, and this guy set off red flags by the story he told you that seems like a lie.

You can wait until you meet someone who makes you feel more comfortable and safe, and does not raise red flags. Or you can get to know this guy more, and meet in public. But it really sounds like...you are not comfortable, and you have reason not to be (he is moving too fast, and making you uncomfortable, and possibly lying, plus you have anxiety). No one can make your decision for you though!

Perhaps take some time off from thinking about this a little. Sometimes that's when our minds get clearer.