I feel like I've completely run out of gas. I don't feel sad. I just feel tired and completely uninterested in life in general. I think this is some new form of depression I'm coming down with. I don't have anxiety at the moment. Just the opposite. I feel like I couldn't care less about everything and anything.

I wonder if other people have experienced extreme apathy.

Funny thing is, past week or so, I felt full of deep concern. My s.o. is sick in the hospital. I had great anxiety Sunday over his condition. Now I feel calmed down from a lot of upset and negative feelings. Unfortunately, it's now like nothing hardly matters to me at all. His situation will resolve, one way or another. I'm not thinking about him right now. I'm just wondering how I keep from sliding down the drain.

I've just spent 7 hours doing next to nothing. I could have used that time in some way that would have made me feel good. It's like I don't think anything will matter. It feels like total laziness. It's like being lost in a day dream. If I had wine in the house, I would have enjoyed a glass. But I don't. And I couldn't be bothered going a few blocks away to get some. I sit in one spot and don't hardly move. For years, I've just been wasting my time.

Maybe if I take a Vicodin, I'll feel less disgusted.