I didn't have the body experiences you had but I got very dysregulated when my last T and I weren't getting along and when, eventually, we terminated. She said that she "didn't have the emotional resources" to continue therapy with me and I felt rejected, abandoned, worthless, kicked to the side, abandoned, powerless, helpless, betrayed, etc.

As I have written on this forum in the past, that real life rejection triggered feelings of being disapproved of and rejected when I was a child, which I eventually re-membered about 6 months after the termination. Living with that, "working through" that, with the non-rejection of this forum and some other support groups, has allowed me to experience rejection as painful but not necessarily life-threatening, or meaning I am worthless to everybody in the world. A long journey, some still to go.

Traumatic or re-traumatic is a difficult question. The conflict and rejection by my last T was "traumatic", but why? My guess is that it was largely because of the old repressed/dissociated/whatever experience from my past, frozen in time.

If I didn't have the support somewhere, as well as other progress which I had made in therapy, then that rejection by my last T would/could have been devastating. But if I hadn't re-experienced the rejection which was too awful to deal with when I was a child, then I couldn't re-member those parts of me.

Now the experience with my last T is becoming simply disappointing, and sad, like my experience with my family.