Last month they cut our pay by about a quarter at my job, so I feel like I have to work hard to have enough to eat next month. So I spent most of Saturday and Sunday working. Well, I stopped in the evening, but didn't feel like doing any of my hobbies because I work in front of a computer and use a computer in most of my hobbies. Well, I did play a video game that I use to study a foreign language, which kind of feels like not being in front of a computer, but instead in a different world. Except I'm feeling more and more dissatisfied with it as a language study tool. I recently finished reading a book in the language and thought this would be a fun, but useful diversion. However it feels like my learning has lost intensity, because I almost don't look words up in a dictionary (because I don't have time) and a lot of stuff just passes by without comprehension.

And to pile up more on that, with the last work project my manager keeps sending me corrections (some of which I just don't understand right now), and I feel like trying to work harder just means that I'm making more mistakes... And that I'm useless at this job - but I have nowhere else to go...

Anyway, dissatisfied, frustrated, hopeless, started crying again, which seems like a sure sign that it's time to open up to someone. Here you go, internet.